Working hard is mandatory
You can be slow and steady or like a bat out of hell but working hard is mandatory
It’s always interesting when you get to talking with people about success. Some think the person that shows up and does what they do and repeats this everyday is more worthy of it than the person who is always changing and moving around. I think it boils down to what people can see and are able to eventually understand about each other. Whether you are a high energy person or a steady even keel type, it is important to realize, in the end it is all about working hard. As a mother of two versions… I am pleased to inform you and your deep psyche that part of your get up and go ain’t ever gonna have anything to do with you specifically… you are a product of your genes here. I know this because I have seen first hand the transferal of all of it. With that said the good news is we all can get there… and how we find ourselves naturally going about the task of it is not our fault!
Working hard starts I would argue in one’s temperament. And I have come to this conclusion both with a sense of satisfaction from observation in both myself, my husband and now our children. Yes…. some of the “fire in the belly” or desire to be like “only the best” is somewhat born in one’s soul. For some this will come as an astonishing surprise and might mitigate at least to some degree a tiny bit of disappointment while for others (nodding their heads with a smile) it has been the most obvious things they’d ever experienced.
Take the toddler that is very busy. To some, and I am referring to adults and educators the child might appear somewhat out of sorts and since they run on a slower speed let’s say they feel the need to slow the child down. Requiring it to take naps and sit still and focus on a somewhat boring toy. This whole process of being pulled down to a common current happens often and happens early. I remember my own father after some episode of excited gibber jabber would exclaim exasperated “Can you please just shut up?” I would of course stop talking but you see after all these years I have not forgotten his exasperation…. some of you should take note of this.
I married for the purposes of this illustration a slower more calmer version of a human being. He is happy guy and totally cool with the status quo. He has been this way since birth. Sitting quietly for hours I am so told to play quietly and not necessarily needing to exude any force in his universe. In fact, the very thought of having to exude forceful anything….would very much rock him out of his so very comfortable zone! He does though work hard and steady. The difference is there’s a methodical calm to his working and you can see it stop and start each day. PSSSSS…. this is the kind of hard working that the teachers and parents like because they can see it!
I, of course was the busy child with her hands on and into several things at once. Not a better way of working but just different. You recall we all get here with different “stuff” and thank the Lord we do! My work starts each day and stops and moves and sways and changes and changes again …. I am on a forever moving platform of creativity and design and innovation. I see big things better and sitting and thinking is most often misunderstood by my peers as doing nothing; when in fact I am quite busy… you just can’t see it. I am over the ridicule and sometimes secretly take score of what I have accomplished in a day that my love and counterpart can not measure. Often, although I shall never admit it if you mention it in front of him I am at least in my mind, more productive even if to the onlooker I do not appear so.
For a long time, in fact all of my twenties and well into my thirties I was bothered by all of this. I was befuddled as to how I could get up at 3am and be obsessed with a new idea, a new column, or a new painting, while my sweet husband could and did and continues to sleep soundly to say a late early morning? I would find myself incensed at the laziness and the pathetic acceptance of a methodical daily rhythm. I did not appreciate the differences until I became a mother and old enough to realize there are as Nana used to say “ more than one way to (you fill in the blank) …..” Here appropriately it is befitting to say there is more than one way to work hard and working hard after all is what gets you where you want to be. There I said it. I am no longer keeping score…I promise!
So there you have it. Lesson number 3 is to work. Working hard at being the best is a task that some take on with a “Carpe Diem” sort of fancy while others do so steadily and perhaps a little less chaotically. Neither is better than the other, just a transformational difference. Here’s a tidbit from my own gallery in life lessons: labeling those creative types as ADHD is only going to make you feel better about the steady temperament you got dealt. It will never change us because we are not paying attention to your boxes:) There is no escaping it at all though in order to be a success and to find your true calling ; work at it slowly or blaze through like a bat out of hell, in the end all of it boils down to really hard work!
